A New Light
by ohsnap its potter
Summary: James and Lily are finally beginning their life as adults. Through it all, they find that maybe, just maybe, they really were meant to be together. Sequel to Their Time of Need.
1. The Adult Life

A/N: Here it is, the sequel to Their Time of Need. If you haven't read that one yet, I suggest you read it first before this one, but if you just want to skip straight to this story, it'll make sense anyways. The first chapters are always hard to write, for it's a boost for the rest of the story, and it's hard to get going. But I hope you enjoy it anyways.

A specail thanks to Abbey for this title. You should have heard her, it was quite possibly one of the funniest things in my life. She was like, "A dark light, A light dark, A darker light, A lighter dark, A new light..." etc etc. you probably had to be there, but they were just popping up like wild fire. It was pretty humorous.

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.

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James Potter shut the door, "That's the last of it!" he sang.

Only the day before had they all moved in, but using the eight of them, they were able to fix up the house and put it together in about twenty four hours. It was fairly large, but considering that eight people were living there, it was a fair size. He ran a hand through his untamed hair and gazed around, only to see Lily tripping over a rug and crashing into Sirius, causing them both to stumble backwards.

"OH!" She gasped, scrambling to her feet and helping him to his, "I'm so sorry, Sirius."

Sirius Black flipped his shining dark hair out of his eyes and rubbed his stomach sorely, "Yep," He said, "You've got yourself a graceful one here, James."

Lily Evans rolled her eyes and blew her hair out of her face, walking to her room. Once inside, she shut the door quietly and flopped on her bed. She gazed around the room, which she was sharing with Sirius' girlfriend, Brenna. It was finished, and Lily soon realized that tonight was the first night they were all going to sleep in the house. Brenna was nice, Lily knew that, but she wasn't Sara.

Sara Brookfield was Sirius' ex girlfriend, and one of Lily's best friends. Sirius and Sara had a strong relationship, but soon Voldemort and his followers murdered her sister. She and her family decided to move to France, much to Sirius' despair. He had only received one letter from her, and Lily suspected that he was having trouble writing one back.

Lily rolled onto her back and stared at the white ceiling. They were adults now. They were living on their own….

Someone ran into the room and flew on top of her, causing her to scream.

"Relax, Lil." James said, kissing her lips softly, "It's just me."

"Yeah well, 'just you' is rather heavy, so if you don't mind…" She said, pushing her boyfriend off.

He laughed and lay down on the bed, patting next to him. It was only a twin bed, but they both managed to squeeze themselves in.

"You okay?" He asked, pulling her closer to him.

Lily nodded, wrapping her arm across his chest, "I can't believe we've finally finished moving in and now we're living here…."

"I know." He agreed, kissing her forehead.

The door swung open, revealing Brenna. "Oh!" She said, "I'm sorry, I'll go…"

"No, don't." James said, getting up, "I was just leaving."

Brenna smiled and watched as James left the room. "Hey, Lily."

Lily grinned, "How are you?"

"Good." She said, pulling her dark, thin hair up into a pony. "I was just going to help Katherine make dinner. Would you care to join us?"

Lily nodded and entered the kitchen where Katherine was scolding Sirius for putting his hand in the salad bowl.

Katherine was Lily's other best friend. They'd been together since their first year of Hogwarts, yet they'd always remained close. Remus and Katherine were together, and Lily could see why. They were alike in many ways, yet in some aspects they were different. Both of them were often quiet and reserved, and they gave great advice. They seemed to be wise beyond their years, something that Lily admired greatly.

She rolled up her sleeves and sniffed, "Mm. Something smells good."

"That's the hot dish." Marlee said, looking up from her game of wizards chess. She was playing with Peter, and they had been together for quite some time. Marlee had curly brown hair and was rather short, yet had striking features. However awful as it sounds, no one, not even the Marauders, could see how he managed to get her. True, Peter was nice, yet he was just so shy it seemed strange that someone so outgoing would take the time out to get to know him. That was probably why everyone loved Marlee so much, she was willing to go beyond the exterior, and actually see the person.

"What do you need help with, Katherine?" Brenna asked, washing her hands.

"The salad." At this she cast a dirty look at Sirius, who earlier was attempting to steal the carrots and peas out of the bowl.

Lily laughed, "Anything I can do?"

"I think we're good now, thanks." She said, bustling to the oven. The house was in a muggle neighborhood, so the appliances were non wizard. Katherine, however, was half blood, and liked cooking the muggle way better, anyways.

Lily plopped down next to Sirius, Remus, and James on the couch, "Hey boys."

They all nodded their greeting. James looked at Lily with a smile, he had always found her beautiful, but for some reason, just watching her sit on the couch in a large sweatshirt and shorts, he couldn't help but find her even more attractive.

They were sitting in the living room, next to the kitchen. Between the eight of them, they had quite a lot of trouble picking colors, so they all decided on tan for the kitchen, and an olive green for the living room. Their own more personal, individual colors were in their bedrooms.

"Dinners almost ready!" Katherine called, "Lily and Marlee, could you set the table."

Sirius put his arms behind his head and put his feet up on the coffee table, "I could get used to living like this, having the women do everything…"

"You're doing the dishes." Katherine snapped. Remus bit his lip to muffle his laughter. "You too, Remus and James!"

"Merlin." James said quietly, "She's got the sense and ears of a fox."

"Thanks!" She sang.

A few minutes later, Katherine and Brenna were setting steaming pans of hot dish and fresh salad in the middle of the table. They began helping themselves, scooping large portions onto their plate.

"Don't you want any hot dish?" James asked Brenna, gesturing to the pan.

"Oh, no thank you." Brenna said, "I'm a vegetarian."

"Really?" Marlee asked, "For how long?"

"Since I was eight." She said, "Almost ten years."

"You've got yourself a good one here, Sirius." James laughed.

For some reason, Sirius' face tightened. He and Brenna were together, and he liked her a lot, but it was scaring him that it meant he had to get over Sara…for good.

Lily quickly shoved some hot dish into her mouth, "So…" She said, after swallowing, "Who's up for desert?"

"We don't have any." Katherine pointed out.

"Oh." Lily said, "Well…we could all go out for ice cream!"

"I'm up for it," Peter said, and everyone nodded their agreement.

After everyone had seconds, and even thirds, they all stood up and began to head for the door.

"Oh no you don't." Katherine laughed, "Boys, you do the dishes."

"She's more like a mum than a girlfriend." Sirius muttered to Remus sourly.

"The ears of a fox, remember?" Katherine asked.

"Oh…" Sirius said, blushing slightly, "Sorry."

After the dishes were done, they all grabbed their jackets and left the house.

"I saw a little shop down the street." Lily said, grabbing James' hand. Once they were there, they all filed inside and ordered. When they got their ice cream, they sat down at a large booth.

"Mm." James said, licking his lips, "Chocolate. My favorite."

"Can I try a bit?" Lily asked leaning over to take a lick of his cone. James shoved it into her face, causing her to squeal. "JAMES!" She shrieked, before she shoved her vanilla cone in his face.

Sirius wrinkled up his nose in disgust, "That was cute, lovebirds." He said sarcastically.

"HEY!" Said the tall, aging man from the counter. "You two! Red head and the one in the glasses. OUT! I don't want anyone making a ruckus in my shop!"

"We'll all go," Remus said, already getting up.

"No," James said, "You guys stay here. You weren't the ones kicked out."

"You sure?"

"Positive."

Lily and James slid out of the booth and exited the shop, and it was then that they broke out into hysterical laughter.

"JAMES!" She cried, smacking his arm "I can believe you did that!"

He leaned over and licked her nose, "There, it's all gone."

"Gross." She said, wiping her nose with her sleeve, but her eyes were sparkling with laughter.

"Did you see his face?" He cried, breaking out into laughter once more, "He was so pissed!"

Lily attempted to keep a straight face, but to no avail. Instead, she ended up snorting rather unfeminine like.

"You're gorgeous." He said, clutching his heart.

She smacked her arm once more, and they both began walking back to the house. "Wow." She said, "Our first real day as adults and we were kicked out of an ice cream parlor."

James laughed once more, putting his arm around her shoulders, and pulling her closer to him. "That's got to be a record." He grinned.

She rolled her eyes, "I never thought that dating a Marauder would make me this immature. Next I'll be asking for a piggy back ride."

"Well come on then." He said, stopping in his tracks and walking in front of her. "Hop on."

"No!" She laughed, "Imagine what the neighbors, not to mention everyone would think!"

"Who cares about them?" He said, "Get on my back."

"No, no, no." Lily said again, resuming walking. "I may have gotten kicked out of an ice cream parlor, but I'm not going to look like a fool."

James ran up to her and swung around, preventing her from getting past. "Please get on?" He pouted, "For me?"

Lily rolled her eyes, pulling her jacket tighter around her. She looked from side to side, before reluctantly muttering, "Fine."

James smiled widely and swung around. "Okay, up you go!" She sighed, but there was a smile on her face as she leapt up onto his back. "You ready?"

She nodded, "Go!" He took off running, sprinting down the road. He swerved pass people, and some stopped to stare, clutching their hearts in alarm. Lily shrieked, "Slow down!"

"NO!" He laughed, finally coming to a halt outside of their house. He bent over and Lily jumped off lightly.

"Thanks, James." She said, "That was strangely freeing."

He chuckled softly, "Anytime." He put his arms around her waist and pulled her into him, "I love you, Lil."

"Mm." She sighed, "I love you, too." She leaned in and kissed him.

When they pulled apart, James was laughing again, "I still can't believe that as our first day as real adults, we were kicked out of an ice cream shop."

Lily giggled, "I could get used to being adults."

He nodded and kissed her again, "At first I didn't want to grow up. But now that you're in my life, I think I like this whole adult thing."

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A/N: For those who have read Their Time of Need, I hope this first chapter meets your expectations. And for everyone whose just joining in, I hope you enjoyed it. Please read and review. Thanks and love you all - Lilly.


	2. Her Two Sons

A/N: Alright, so here's chapter two of A New Light. It's light and fluffy in the beginning of this chapter, but then it gets dreadfully sad. But hey, this whole story has its ups and downs, but I accepted that when I chose to write it. James and Lily's story is so tragic. I hope you enjoy it!

A specail thanks to my beta: Liv. She's amazing. We were talking about this chapter today, and she helped me realize that what happens in the chapter had to happen. I finished this chapter today, sent it, and when I checked my computer it was already sent back. That's how quick and amazing she is! You should check out her stories...they're also quite amazing...

REVIEWERS: I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH!

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.

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Lily poured herself a glass of orange juice and walked outside. She wasn't a fan of coffee, never had been and doubted she ever would be. It was early in the morning – around six, and so far, she was the only one up.

She shut the door quietly, feeling the sharp wind whip past her face. She zipped up her jacket and sat on the white bench on the front porch. It had been there when they had moved in, and she planted her bare feet on the floor, pushing off. The swing rocked back and forth quietly, and she sighed, sipping her juice.

Last night when Brenna had come back, Lily was already sleeping. There hadn't been any awkward confrontation, or easy conversation. There was nothing, and for that Lily wasn't sure if she should be grateful or not. She swung her feet onto the bench and held the cup between her hands. It was strange, not waking up in Hogwarts or her house. There was no breakfast ready, no one wandering throughout the corridors or halls. It was just quiet and empty. Lily liked the peace every once in a while.

The door swung open and Lily grinned inwardly. '_So much for peace_.' She thought. Remus walked out onto the porch and smiled.

"Hey, Lily."

"Good morning Remus." She said, putting her legs back on the floor and patting to the seat next to her. He sat down and they looked around in silence for a while.

"Did you have a good night sleep?" He asked conversationally.

Lily nodded, "How about you?"

He shrugged, "Peter snores like a beast. That's what woke me up."

She giggled, "I'm lucky Brenna is a quiet sleeper."

"Cherish that with your life."

Lily laughed and took another gulp of her orange juice. "Should we surprise everyone and make breakfast for when they wake up?"

"Yeah, sure." He said, "I'll go get my wand."

"Oh no, Remus. I thought we'd make it the muggle way."

"Really?" He asked, surprised. "I've never done it like that before."

"Well come on, I'll teach you." She said, grabbing his upper arm and heaving him to his feet. Together they walked inside to the kitchen and grabbed a few pots and pans.

Each of them had chipped in for something in the house. Dishes, furniture, paint, or accessories, they all picked something to help pay for. When it came to food, they would split the cost eight ways. Unless just a few of them went out to eat, then they had to pay for it themselves. It really was a good plan, and it saved them a lot.

Lily opened up the fridge, and grabbed out the carton of eggs, cracking them over the pan.

"Grab some eggs," Lily said, "And then crack them like this."

She showed him how to crack eggs and make omelets, how to use the stove, and use other household appliances. Around thirty minutes later, Katherine was making her way into the kitchen, a blanket wrapped around her.

She sniffed, "Something smells good."

"We're making omelets." Remus said proudly, gesturing to the plates full of food.

Katherine smiled and kissed him, "Did you make these all by yourself?"

"Well…I guess I had a _little_ help from Lily…"

Lily rolled her eyes, "Thanks, Remus."

He laughed, "Anyways, we've only made two, but we'll quick make you one. That way when everyone else wakes up theirs won't be cold. We'll just make them then."

"Let's eat outside." Lily suggested, "It's beautiful out."

The three of them grabbed their omelets once Katherine's was made, and walked out onto the front porch. Lily sat down on the front step, allowing them to sit on the white swing.

"How was your omelet?" Remus asked Katherine as she finished, and put her plate on the floor.

She wrinkled up her nose, "It was alright, I guess…" but unable to keep a straight face, she giggled.

He put on a face of mock anger, set his plate on the floor also, and leaned across to tickle her.

"Take that back!" He cried.

"Never!" She laughed. "Stop tickling me!"

Remus shook his head, "Not unless you take it back."

Lily shook her head, "Better do what he says, Kath." She grinned and walked inside to put her plate away.

"STOP!" Katherine shrieked, turning red from laughing so hard.

"Take it back!" He grinned, leaned over so that their noses were almost touching.

"Alright." She said softly as he stopped tickling her, "I take it back. The omelet was fantastic."

He smiled, satisfied, and leaned in to kiss her. "I love you, Katherine."

"I love you, too." She said, giving him another kiss.

"That was cute." Sirius said from the doorway, still clad in his red sweat pants and white shirt. He took another bite of his omelet, "Just like a movie."

"Go inside, Sirius." Katherine laughed.

He chewed his omelet and nodded, turning back around and meandering back inside the house. Everyone was up, besides Brenna. He wondered faintly why everyone was up so early, for he usually slept later, but then he realized that they were adults, and that's what they do.

He grinned and walked into Brenna's room, shutting the door quietly. He walked over to her bed and watched her. She was beautiful, no doubt about that. Her hair was splayed across her pillow, and her cheeks were a light pink. He could have done the sweet thing and kissed her softly until she awoke, but that wouldn't be as much fun.

He jumped onto the bed, causing her to groan unappreciatively. He pulled the covers off of her and lay on top of her back lightly. "Get up sleepy head."

"Get _off_ stupid head." She muttered, shifting as to knock him off.

Sirius laughed and kissed her cheek, "Come on, Brenna. Get up."

She groaned and rolled over. "Fine."

He kissed her and got up, "You're quite easy to wake up."

He wondered if Sara was easy to wake up, and suddenly he felt himself become sick. Why the hell was he thinking of her at a time like this? It didn't matter if she was hard or easy to wake up. He would never be able to do it, or even see her again. Let alone be with her….

"You all right sweetie?" Brenna asked with concern, getting up and putting her arms around his neck.

"Yeah." He murmured, "I'm just going to go… and uh… do the… the thing…" He left the room without finishing his sentence, leaving Brenna looking around in confusion. He shut the door and leaned up against it, running his hands over his face.

"You okay, Padfoot?" James asked, walking over to him.

Sirius gave him a lopsided grin, "Everything is changing, but I'm glad that one thing stays the same."

"What?" James asked, "I still know when you're troubled?"

"That," Sirius said, "And we still have our nicknames."

"And always will." James agreed, "Marauders forever."

Sirius smiled, "Marauders forever." He agreed.

"Now what's the problem?"

"Nothing." Sirius said. He didn't want to talk about it. Not with James, and not with anyone. He had this rip in his heart. A rip, he realized, that would never go away. Sighing, and assuring an uncertain James that he was okay, they walked back into the kitchen together.

"I have to go to work." Katherine said, swinging her purse onto her shoulder. She worked as a reporter for a popular quidditch magazine, which was perfect for her. She loved quidditch, and if she couldn't be playing it, at least she could watch it, and write about it.

"Bye, have fun!" They all chorused.

"Yeah." Marlee agreed, "I should go. I have an interview with another student who just left Hogwarts. We might work together."

"What are you planning to do?" Brenna asked, standing near the back of the kitchen, already dressed in jeans and a button up shirt.

"I'm thinking about joining a business that helps other people find what they want to do with their lives." Marlee grinned, "But first, I have to find out what to do with mine."

"Maybe you can help me." James said, "I'm still confused on what I want to do."

"Same." A bunch of them agreed.

It was time they all searched for jobs, and the only one that had one was Katherine. Marlee was close, however, but the rest were still uncertain, especially Remus.

No one would ever accept him, he realized. He was a werewolf, and most people thought of them as dark and dangerous creatures…

Remus sighed and rubbed his temples as everyone discussed what they were about to do that day. Finally, about two hours later, they all decided to leave the house. Some were in search of a job, or an interview, and some just wanted some fresh air and to explore.

Lily put a scarf around her neck, "Ready, James?"

He nodded, "I've been waiting for you, Lil. We're the only ones left."

"Well sorry if I have enjoy my personal hygiene and like to shower." She replied sarcastically.

They began heading for the door when they heard a loud, 'POP!' in the other room. Catching each others uncertain eyes, they walked back into the living room.

James' dad was standing there, his eyes large and watery. He was still clad in his pajamas, and had this distant look on his face.

"Dad?" James asked slowly, "What are you doing here?"

"Your mum." His dad said quietly, "She…she's ill…"

Lily clamped a hand to her mouth. Linda Potter couldn't be ill. "Is it serious?" She asked, her eyes full of worry.

Harold nodded reluctantly, as if he didn't want to admit it to himself. "She's…she's… the healers say they don't think she's going to make it…"

James snapped his eyes shut as if he had been stung. He knew something was wrong the moment his father had arrived, for he was a strong man who rarely cried.

"Where is she?" James asked.

"Back at the house. Come on"

Together, all three of them apparated to the Potter's household. James sprinted into his parent's bedroom, his hair flying behind him. He opened the door slowly, and he felt a large lump rise in his throat.

"Mum?"

"Hi, honey." She said softly.

James sighed in relief to see that she was actually talking. All of this was so sudden. "What happened?"

"I don't know, baby. One moment I was fine and the next…" She laughed but it barely came out. The sound was raspy and filled with pain. "How are you?"

"I don't want to talk about me." James said, walking over to her bed in two strides and touching her cheek softly.

He had never seen his mother like this before. Her hair was greasy and unkempt, and her eyes were large and faraway. Her already tiny frame was even more slender than before, and she looked more than slightly pale.

"You are so handsome." She said softly, trailing her bony hand down his cheek. "Just like your father.

"Oh mum…" James said; feeling tears sting at the back of his eyes. "You're going to make it, right? You're going to be okay…"

"I don't know, darling. All we can do is hope, and keep our strength," She said, sighing.

The door opened but James didn't look to see who it was. Nothing mattered at that moment. All he wanted to do was save his mother from an invisible illness.

"Hey mum," came a soft voice. James looked up to see Sirius.

"Hello Sirius," she said, a smile appearing on her face, "My two handsome boys."

Sirius gave a lopsided grin and crossed over to her, taking one of her small hands in both of his. "You look beautiful."

Linda scoffed, "You're a liar."

"No I'm not."

James smiled and took his mother's hand, and that was when her tears began to flow. "I'm so proud of you boys." She said softly.

Sirius and James eyes locked, and both of them poured out their pain. James' mind was fuzzy and he was having trouble breathing. What was going to happen next?

"You're my son, Sirius." She said, looking into his eyes. "And I love you very much. Thank you for making such a delightful…and _entertaining_ impact on my life."

Sirius nodded and he felt his lip quiver. This woman before him met so much to him. It was because of her that he was the person he is today. "Love you too, mum." He said, kissing her forehead softly.

James' whole face became contorted, "Why are you acting as if this is goodbye? Can't the healers do more to make you better? We're magic for Merlin's sake."

She nodded, "Oh, James. Don't worry, they've done everything they can."

"No they haven't." James said furiously, "If they had it wouldn't be like this. You would be laughing and making us tea. You would be smiling and hugging us and…" His voice shook, "You wouldn't be like this."

Linda let a small sob escape her throat. "I love you, James. My baby boy." She brought her small arms up to wrap around his neck and pull him to her. "I'm so proud of the man you are today. You're an amazing friend, son, and person, James."

James felt tears stream down his cheeks as he clung to his mother. He rocked her back and forth slightly, feeling her small frame shake beneath him. "I love you so much, mum…" He moaned, "I don't want this to happen…"

"But it has happened," She whispered into his ear, "Everything's going to be okay."

Sirius buried his face in his hands. He couldn't watch it any longer. He was always a strong person, but this…this was too much. Linda Potter couldn't be dying. She just couldn't. His face was shaking, and the inside of his chest was contracted so tightly, he felt there was no more air left to breathe.

Linda and James pulled apart. "Can I speak with your father?"

They both nodded, and left. Sirius and James emerged into the hall, and Harold Potter entered.

James crumpled to the floor, but Sirius caught him and pulled him back up.

He pulled his friend into a hug, and James pulled at the back of his shirt, as if Sirius was the only thing keeping him standing. He felt his tears flow into his friend's shirt.

"Sirius…" He moaned.

"I know, man." Sirius said, resting his chin on his shoulder and staring blankly at the wall ahead of him. "I know."

Lily bit her nails a fair distance away. She didn't know what to do. She had only met the Potter's a few times. She desperately wanted to get to know them more…

But what hurt her most was seeing James and Sirius cry into each other. They were both feeling equal pain, and she could feel her own face crumple.

Finally Harold emerged from the bedroom and walked over to Lily. "She'd like to see you, too."

"Me?" Lily asked, dumbfounded. She nodded and stumbled into the bedroom.

Harold walked over to Sirius and James, and pulled them both into a hug. "She had cancer." He said, "No one knew about it. She had a heart attack today. And the healers said the most she'll live is another twenty four hours."

James nodded, but he didn't and couldn't believe it.

Lily wandered into the room uncertainly. "Hi, Mrs. Potter."

"Oh, Lily." She said softly, "Call me Linda."

Lily knelt down beside her bed and grabbed her hand. "How are you?"

"I just wanted to say thank you." Linda said.

Lily was taken completely aback, "For what?"

"For making my little boy happy. He loves you with all his heart Lily." She said softly, "You're perfect for him."

Two tears fell down Lily's cheek. "I love him, too."

"Do you know the other one, Sara?" Linda continued.

Lily nodded, "She moved away to France."

"I know." She said, "But she should know that she made the biggest smile I have ever seen come across Sirius' face."

She grinned, "He loved her so much."

Linda nodded and touched Lily's hair gently, "Do me a favor will you?" She asked, "James and Sirius, and even Harold will find some way to blame themselves for this. Please… keep smiles on their faces, even in the darkest times. Don't let this destroy them. Could you do that for me?"

Lily nodded, "I can do that."

A while later she exited the room. Harold, Sirius, and James were sitting on separate chairs in the living room, and all three of them leapt up at the sight of her.

"How is she?" They asked simultaneously.

Lily shrugged, "As good as can be expected."

They spent the entire night with Linda. Soon Peter and Remus came over, and bid farewell to her. They knew her so well, and it was astounding to everyone that she could be gone…just like that. The rest of the girls came, also.

Then, at 12:45 A.M., Linda Potter passed away.

Lily held James tightly, "It'll be okay, James." She whispered in his hair.

He nodded as tears spilled onto her shoulder. "I can't believe she's gone."

"Shh…" Lily said, "You'll be alright, okay? I promise."

James nodded again, "My poor father…"

She shook her head, "Things like this shouldn't happen, James, but they do. Be thankful you spent as much time with her as you did. She died a happy woman, James. And part of the reason she was so happy was because of you."

All James could do was let her hold him and cry over his loss. Times were so grave but it wasn't even the dark lord that had taken his mother from him, it was a disease that no one could have stopped.

She held him closer to her, "I love you, James. Whatever happens, I'm here for you, remember? Forever and always."

"Forever and always." James agreed softly.

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A/N: Alright, so I was having a hard time writing this. I found it super sad... But we all know James and Lily's parents die before they do, and I didn't want it all to happen at once, that would just be cruel. This way it makes their relationship stronger also. However, this whole story won't be sadness the whole time, there will also be humor and fluff! Please read and review! 


	3. Just One Smile

A/N: Hey everyone, sorry about the wait. I kind of left you on a sad note, so therefore it starts on a sad note as well. I hope you enjoy this chapter!

Reviewers: I love you all.

Thank you to my beta Liv. She's amazing and always gets it back to me A.S.A.P. I love you Livypoobear!

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.

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Lily tightened her hold on James' hand as she felt him shake unconsciously. She felt her own tears slide down her cheeks silently, and she bowed her head. She was racking her brain, trying desperately to find something to say to make James feel even the slightest bit comforted, but nothing came to her. All she could do was kiss his hand occasionally and look him in the eyes, silently reminding him she was there for them. Forever and always. 

Sirius strode over to them slowly, an odd look on his face. They were at Linda Potter's wake, and neither James nor Sirius had entered the building yet.

Peter and Remus came a few moments later, followed by Katherine, Marlee, and Brenna. They were all gathered outside the building, standing around in awkward silence.

Remus gave James a hug after a while.

"How are you?" Remus asked, his face full of concern.

James shrugged. He didn't have an answer to that. He couldn't feel anything but a dull numbness in his heart. They had all been planning her wake and funeral, but soon it became too difficult for James, Sirius, and Harold, so they reluctantly allowed Lily to take over.

He barely slept, barely ate… when he did sleep he awoke to the sound of his father sobbing in his empty room. James would often walk in to see his father smelling his mother's pillow, allowing his tears to spill onto it.

Finally, about two days after her death, James walked in to find his father, his body wracking with sobs, sitting on his wife's side of the bed. And James did the only think he could think of doing. He crossed the room in two strides and pulled his father closer to him, kissing the top of his head as if he were a little boy. But they needed each other, and the comfort they both received from one another was comfort they couldn't find anywhere else.

James shook his head at the memory and looked around at the people filing inside. He didn't feel as if he could go inside, but the silent palm squeezing from Lily comforted him in a way he hadn't thought possible.

Sirius scuffed the toe of his show in the gravel, his eyes concentrating on a crack. His eyes followed it, and he willed himself to focus on that, and only that. But it was no use. His mind would wander back to the most painful memories.

He remembered the first time he moved in. He was standing on the Potter's front porch, the rain causing his hair to plaster to his face. James pulled him in immediately and sat him down, and soon Linda and Harold came also.

Linda's face is what struck him hardest. She looked so worried, wondering if he was okay. And when she found out he was, she was angry. Angry that his family treated him this way. Once she got over that, she looked determined. Determined to make his life the best he could possibly have. It seemed that at that moment, she adopted another son and vowed to be the best mother in her ability.

Another painful day flitted through his memory, not so many months ago, that week after Christmas. After Sara had… He remembered lying in his bed when Linda came in. He feared the words of comfort that would come from her, words he's grown to hate in the days since Sara had gone. But instead she set the tea she had brought him down on the bed side table, and crawled into bed with him. She allowed her cool fingers to smooth his hair, and she did what no one else had been able to do, which was to let him cry, instead of trying to fill the void Sara had left with useless words that wouldn't change the fact she was gone.

Sara… He needed her so much right now. He had been her strength that had gotten her through Meredith's wake and funeral. He needed so badly for her to do the same. His heart ached at the fact that the two most important women in his life were gone. He felt small fingers intertwine with his, and looked down to see Brenna holding his hand. It wasn't the same. He needed Linda.

Sirius smiled grimly, wondering if he had been a good enough son. He wouldn't allow himself to dwell on that however, for he knew it would do no good. Linda was gone, and it wasn't until now that he fully realized how much he truly did love her. She was his mother.

James and Sirius looked at each other after a while, and when their eyes met, they both bit their lip, wondering how on earth they could go inside. Lily tugged on James' hand gently, begging him to look down. He finally did, gazing at her, seemingly emotionless. Lily saw beyond that however, and her heart was breaking when she saw all that hurt.

He took a deep breath, and then stepped foreword, closer and closer into the building. Finally he emerged through the doors, and he felt his heart collapse. Everyone around him turned to look, tear stains down their faces and sympathy in their eyes.

James felt a hand clamp onto his shoulder and he tipped his head up to see Sirius, looking somewhere off into the distance. All three of them made their way to the casket while everyone else waited outside, unsure of what to do.

With each step they could feel their heart beat increase painfully and more and more tears burn at the back of their eyes. James took a deep breath and peered into the open casket to see his mother, her hands folded over her chest peacefully.

He choked out a sob and turned away, covering his mouth with his fist. He groaned and Lily kissed his hand again and again, almost frantically.

Sirius slowly reached down and touched her cold cheek. He pulled back as if stung and closed his eyes. She really was gone, then. Gathering enough courage, he placed his large hand over hers.

"Hey mum." He said softly, "Merlin, you look gorgeous. But you know, you'd look even more gorgeous is you were smiling." He grinned lopsidedly, "I'll miss you. I mean, of course I will, but…I really wish I had gotten the chance to tell you how much you meant to me. I wish I could have said it sooner when you were smiling that dazzling smile…"

He broke off, having trouble breathing, "But that's how I'll picture you, okay? I'll picture you smiling and dancing and laughing. I'm going to try my best to remember all the times when you were happy. Because that's who you were Mum, a happy, loving person. And I love you so much. I'm…I'm going to miss you…"

James and Lily watched, trying to blink back their tears. Soon she released her hold on his hand and nodded, as if telling him it was okay. That he had to be there.

He crossed over to Sirius and stood next to him, finally looking down at his mother. Her brown hair was sprawled elegantly, and her cheeks were a soft shade of pink. She was wearing her favorite dress, and soon he found it too much to just stare at his forever sleeping mother. He shook violently and Sirius turned quickly to catch him, whispering words into his ear. James didn't know exactly what he was saying, but the fact that he was there was comforting.

James rested his head on his friends shoulder and stared at his mother once more.

"I don't think you know how much I'm going to miss you." He whispered. "_I_ don't even know."

Sirius closed his eyes and pulled his friend closer, "It'll be okay, man. I promise."

James shook his head and reared back. "I'm tired of crying, Padfoot." He said. "It's not doing anything."

He nodded, "I know, James. But there's nothing we _can_ do."

"We could have noticed!" James cried, and everyone looked away, trying desperately not to stare. "Why were we so concentrated on girls and jobs and each other, but not her?

Sirius stared at the ground, "I don't know. But it's not our fault."

"Of course it is." James hissed, "There must have been signs we missed. She had cancer for Merlin's sake! She must have had it for a while!"

"Stop blaming yourself," Sirius said quietly.

James kicked the wall, "Why didn't we stop this?"

"It's not our fault." Sirius repeated. "It wasn't ours to stop."

Lily ran up and gave James a hug, "He's right. This was no one's fault."

James just shook his head and allowed himself to be held by her, Sirius bowing his head sadly.

The rest of the day went by similarly. James' dad came, and he, Sirius, and James all held each other and soothed one another. James was incredibly quiet, and whenever he did speak, his voice was far away and distant.

Finally the day was over, and the kids all went back to their houses. James, however, went to go stay with his dad as he had been doing the past couple of days.

He apparated to his house, and soon Harold arrived.

"Hey son." He said, wandering into the kitchen. "Rough day, huh?"

James shrugged and sat down at a stool. "Lily said it was just like a muggle ceremony, only things weren't floating."

Harold chuckled quietly. "Yeah, well, I bet muggles aren't used to floating candles and such."

James shook his head and watched as his father sat down at a stool, also. "You okay, dad?"

He sighed and looked towards the ceiling, "Can anyone be when they've experienced this much grief?"

"But you're going to be okay, right?" James asked, some what desperately. He couldn't bear to have his father living out the rest of his years in misery.

"I will be." Harold said after a while. "But it's for her. Linda would have wanted us to keep smiling."

James nodded and they sat in silence for a while, each lost in their own thoughts.

Finally his father declared that he was off to bed, and with that he walked into his bedroom, shutting the door behind him quietly.

James covered his face with his hands and sighed.

---

It was roughly a week later, and James and Sirius were sitting on the floor at their house, playing a game of exploding snap. It was a silent game between them, however, for they had nothing to say. No laughs ensued; no snappy, witty comebacks came from each other. They wondered if anything would ever be the same again.

Lily sat cross legged on a chair, sipping on her tea. Her and Remus met each other's eyes and they smiled grimly, noticing the stone silence around the whole house. Peter was sitting at the table across from Lily, making patterns with his forefinger.

Finally, he stood up. "I've had it." Peter said quietly, "I can't stand to watch them be this sad, we have to do something."

"And what do you propose we do?" Remus asked, somewhat sourly.

"Let's throw a party." Peter said.

Lily shook her head, "I don't think that's such a good idea, they're probably not up for that."

"If we don't do something, they never will be." Peter said, "We have to let them know we're here for them."

Remus grinned, "You're a wise boy, Wormtail."

They all walked out of the kitchen and into a bedroom to plan. They didn't know what to do, all they knew was that they need to make them happier. If not that, then they at least had to make them smile… _truly_ smile. It was almost frantic planning; they wanted to do it as soon as possible. It was hard watching the ones that always made them smile mope around the house, looking as if they possessed no emotion.

"We should bewitch something to become an elephant." Peter said, "And then give them elephant rides."

"How about something a little less noticeable?" Lily asked, "So the muggle neighbors don't notice anything."

"A llama?" Peter asked, and then he burst out laughing. "That would make them smile! Who on earth would think of llama rides?"

"Only you, Wormtail." Remus said seriously. "Anyways, maybe we could make them a card, you know? Telling them how much we're there for them."

"That would be sweet." Lily said, smiling warmly.

"Sweet, yes." Peter said, "But boring. What's wrong with the llama rides?"

"Everything." Remus said, "Trust me."

"We can get streamers and balloons." Peter continued, "Do you have any ideas Lily?"

"Anything that will make them smile." She said slowly, "I vote we do everything we can come up with."

"Agreed." Remus and Peter said simultaneously.

Two hours later, Remus, Peter and Lily were ushering Sirius and James into a bedroom.

"Stay in there!" Remus ordered.

They all three contacted Katherine, Marlee, and Brenna, and they apparated in just a few minutes, eager to help. Together, they did everything less than an hour, Sirius and James still in a bedroom silently playing exploding snap.

"Tell them to come out into the back yard." Peter said.

Lily nodded and scurried inside, stopping just outside the door. She knocked softly and opened it without waiting for a reply. "Hey boys." She grinned, "Would you come out with me?"

"Are you going to tell us why you locked us in a bedroom together?" James asked, "I'm in love with you Lily, not Sirius."

She laughed, "I know, so would you both please come with me?"

They nodded, looking at each other in confusion. They each took one of her hands and allowed her to steer them into the back yard.

"Are your eyes closed?" She asked. They closed their eyes and nodded, just before she flung open the door. "Okay." She whispered, "Look."

They opened their eyes at the same time and looked around. All of their friends were standing there, smiling sheepishly.

"Surprise?" Peter offered.

They had cast a spell on the backyard to make it invisible to muggles. The ground was covered with sparkles, for Peter thought that glitter could make anyone smile. Sirius and James grinned.

"What is this?" Sirius asked, walking further out.

"We decided you both needed something to lift your spirits." Lily smiled.

"Is that a _llama_?" James asked incredulously, looking at the brown animal beside Peter.

"Maybe…" Peter said, before they all burst out laughing. The circumstances weren't all that funny. Sure there was a glittery ground, and a llama, but the fact was that people were able to breathe. After all the tension and sorrow that had been built up, they finally felt as if something had been lifted off of their chests. It meant a lot to them that someone actually cared and was there for them.

Lily ran over to James and he enveloped her into a giant hug. "I love you." He whispered into her ear.

She grinned and ran her hands threw his hair, "I love you, too."

He sighed, "I'll get through this, you know? I have everyone here for me. I have _you_ ."

"You'll always have me." She said, kissing him again.

He wrapped her arms around her waist and they all spent the night outside, walking around on sparkles and watching Peter ride the llama. And that night, Sirius and James smiled for the first time in quite awhile.

* * *

A/N: I sincerely hoped you liked it and I hope you stick with this story. For in a just a few chapters there's an event that's...well, you'll see. :) haha, i sound like a lame advertiser. Anways, please review. Thanks and love you all - Lilly. 


	4. The Career of a Life Time

A/N: holy merlin this chapter took a while to put out. i had a little gap in my fanfictioning but i'm backk :) hope you enjoy this chapter and bear with me, this story is going places.

(Sorry if this chapter appeared more than once. I had a bit of a mishap.)

REVIEWERS: I love you all!

Disclaimer: i do not own Harry Potter.

A special thanks to my beta Liv. I love youu!

* * *

Lily stabbed a piece of pancake with her fork. "I should go look for a job today. Would you care to come?" 

James shrugged, "I promised I'd go look for one with Sirius. Where were you thinking of looking?"

She swirled around her breakfast with her fork, "I may go talk to Joey."

James tightened his hold on his cup, "Your old boyfriend?"

"Yes. Actually he told me to come find him once I was out of school. He said he'd help me find a job." She took a sip of her juice, peering at James carefully over the top of her cup.

"You're capable of finding one on your own." He pointed out.

"Of course I am, James." She said softly, "But I think you and I can both agree that especially in times like these, anything that will help find a career is most helpful."

He sighed, looking around the empty kitchen. Everyone but Sirius and Brenna were out, and they were both getting ready for the day. "You're right." He agreed quietly, "But if that guy tries to make a move on you, don't be afraid to sock him, alright?"

Lily raised her eyebrows. "You, above all, should know that I have never been afraid to sock a boy. Surely you remember that, _Potter_?"

He laughed, "I see how it is, _Evans_."

* * *

Sirius poised his quill by the sheet of parchment in frustration. He was attempting for what felt like the hundredth time, and it mostly likely _was_, to write to Sara. He ran his hand through his hair again, trying desperately to focus. He had so much to say, yet so little. There was no way words could describe what he had gone through…what he was going through that very second. 

He wanted to tell her something, anything to get her to come back. But as soon as he thought about writing that down, he realized that would mean the end of him and Brenna. Even though she wasn't Sara, he still cared about her…a lot.

There was a knock on the door and Brenna entered without waiting for a response. Sirius quickly shoved the parchment into a drawer that was slightly ajar, and slammed it closed.

"Hey, babe." He said, leaning up against it nervously.

Her brow furrowed as she tried to push past him. "Who were you writing to?"

"No one." He said quickly, holding her away from the drawer, "it was nothing."

She stopped trying to get pass him and sighed, covering her face with her hands. "It was her, wasn't it?" She mumbled, "Sara?"

"Don't be ridiculous." He said, although he himself could here the untruthfulness in his words.

She pulled her hands away, "When are you going to stop this, Sirius?"

"Stop what?" He asked innocently.

She bit her lip, her brown hair falling about her face. "If you want to be with her then please, stop lying to me. Stop telling me you care about me when all the time you're dreaming about her." He tried putting his arms around her waist but she pushed him away. "I care about you so much Sirius. But you have no idea how much it hurts to see you staring off into space and I can practically see her dancing in your eyes. And when someone mentions her name, your whole body seems to lift and droop in despair, all at the same time. You're so busy worried about yourself and Sara, that you completely forget about me. Sara was the one who left _you_, and yet you still can't move on when she obviously has. Please…just be honest with me. If the only girl you'll ever care about is her, then tell me now. Tell me now so I can leave and not make things anymore serious."

He felt as though someone had slapped him across the face. She wasn't harsh, yet he deserved every word that she spoke. She was right; he was focusing so much on himself that he didn't realize it was affecting her, too.

"I'm sorry." He said honestly, successfully putting his arms around her waist. "I haven't been fair to you."

She said nothing, but soon laid her head on his chest.

He kissed her softly. "And I'm sorry I haven't given you the attention you deserve."

She laughed as he nuzzled her neck. "I forgive you." She said, "But only because your worth it. And you're just so cute."

He gave a lopsided grin and kissed her again, this time more deeply. When they pulled back and he brought her into a hug, he could feel his heart begin to tear. He had basically just admitted that he was over Sara, and that he was further more going to give Brenna all his attention. He wanted to, he really did. He wanted to forget everything about Sara because she had caused him so much pain. But he knew that it would never happen, and he knew that he still cared about her deeply.

That's what caused him to be angry and disgusted with himself. He had a beautiful girl in his arms. She was not only beautiful, but smart, too. She knew what was going on; she knew that he didn't care about her as much as he did Sara.

But what she didn't know, and this was what disgusted him the most, was that when they'd kiss, even if only for a fraction of a second, he would envision her as Sara.

* * *

Lily paused and looked at the address in her hand, double checking that she was at the right house. She had flooed over near the neighborhood, then walked the rest to his house. 

She brought up her fist and pounded on the door a few times before it was swung open almost immediately.

"Lil!" Joey brought her into a hug with one arm, "How are you?"

She grinned against his chest, "I'm good, and you?"

He pulled back, "I'm fantastic. Here, come on in."

Lily allowed him to steer her inside his house. It was a good size, with large, blue couches in the living room. She took a seat and crossed her legs, leaning back comfortably.

"Would you like something to drink?" He asked.

She nodded, "I'll have a glass of water, thanks."

Lily gazed around the living room as he hustled into the kitchen. There were a few pictures of him and some friends, and one of him and her. She grinned and stood up, touching the hanging frame lightly. It was when they were going out, and he was kissing her cheek and tickling her, causing her to giggle.

"I love that picture." He noted from the doorway, causing her to spin around. He took a sip of his water and motioned the glass towards the picture once more, "Brings back memories."

Lily blushed an sat back down, "I can't believe I haven't seen you in a year."

He nodded, handing her the water and sitting down on a chair across from her. "So, you called earlier today about finding a job?"

She took a gulp of water, "Yes. I was wondering if you had fulfilled your dream of becoming a healer…"

Joey leaned forward eagerly, his light brown hair falling in front of his eyes. He pushed it out of his face, "Of course I have. Are you looking to become a healer as well?"

Lily stared into her glass, "I have the N.E.W.T.S to become one. And hearing the way you talked about it, well…it kind of inspired me."

He stood up, "I'm flattered Miss Evans. It is still Miss, right?"

She nodded, "I'm not married. Not yet, anyways."

"Not yet?" He frowned, "Are you with someone?"

"Yes." She seemed surprised he didn't know; then realized he graduated before she and James had gotten together. "I'm with James."

Joey choked on his water. "Wait…let me get this straight. You're with James Potter? Your former enemy?"

"That's the one." She said lightly, "Are you with someone?"

"Nah." He shrugged, "I've been really focused on my career." His face lit up as it had when she had told him he was the reason she wanted to become a healer, "Speaking of which, I wasn't going into work today, but since you are interested, why don't I show you around?"

"You'd do that?" She smiled.

"Of course." He said, "Come on, let's go."

After telling her the address, they both apparated to his work.

Lily landed into the office and stumbled into a desk. She blew her hair out of her eyes and straightened herself, "Not my most graceful landing." She admitted under her breath.

"Happens to the best of us." Joey, who was right beside her, grinned. "Come on, I'll show you the ropes."

They walked around. It wasn't the most inviting thing, with stark white walls and black desks scattered around. The people seemed nice enough, but there was a saddening aura about the place. They strolled past rooms with people being examined inside, and finally stopped at another black desk.

"This is my office!" He gestured to it and sat down, twirling around in his chair. He stopped and put his hands on his desk, "Pretty, huh?"

Lily bit her lip, "It seems, well…"

"Depressing?" He offered, "I know. This is where people are brought to be healed, but we're often sent to places where there have been battles. We've been called in a lot lately because of You-Know-Who. Anyways, we do the paper work here, and people who aren't serious cases come here. I don't know, the office doesn't really reflect the job. It's more…" He paused, "It's more satisfying. The feeling you get from helping someone, or saving someone's life. It's an amazing job, Lily."

"I don't doubt it." She said softly.

"Well." Joey grabbed a stack of papers and thumbed through them, "If you're still interested, I bet I could pull a few strings and get you a job here."

"REALLY?" She squealed, standing up abruptly.

He chuckled, "Really. But, even if I do pull a few strings, you still have a lot of work ahead of you." He handed her the papers, "Here. Look through these and fill them out. Then we can start your training."

"Joey you're amazing!" She cried, grabbing his hand and pulling him into a hug. "I can't even begin to tell you how much this means to me."

"Hey. I was a student just out of Hogwarts once. I know how hard this can be."

"Well you just made it so much easier!" Lily snatched her purse up off of the ground, "I have to get home and tell James." She hugged him once more, "Thanks again, Joey!"

Lily apparated into the kitchen and threw her purse on the table. "James?"

"He's not here." Brenna said, "He and Sirius went looking for jobs."

She frowned, somewhat disappointed. She had hoped to tell him the news as soon as she arrived home. She strode over to the table and sat down across from Brenna who was reading a book.

"What are you reading?" Lily asked, drumming her hands on the wood.

Brenna held it up, "It's called Living Life."

Lily shrugged, "It sounds interesting but I've never heard of it."

"It's really interesting, actually." Brenna said, "You can read it after I'm done. This author is one of my favorites."

Lily smiled warmly, "Sounds great."

* * *

"Sirius!" James scolded, "Straighten your tie!" 

"Yes, Mum." Sirius groaned. "Merlin, James, relax."

"Well maybe you should up tighten!" James said harshly under his breath.

Sirius snorted, "What did you just say?"

James didn't answer, however, for he was too busy repeatedly bringing his fist down on a large door.

"Stop, Prongs!" Sirius cried, grabbing his friend's wrist, "I think they heard you."

James wrenched his hand out of his friend's grip and flattened his suit, "I'm just nervous, that's all. I mean, I know I have the N.E.W.T.S and ability to become one but…I never thought I'd be standing in front of the building like this. This is one of the few plans I've actually gone through with."

Sirius thumped his hand on James' shoulder, "I know how you're feeling mate."

James turned to face him, worry creasing his brow, "We should have told someone…anyone. I should have told Lily."

"No." Sirius said sternly, "We agreed we wouldn't tell anyone except Remus and Peter. We promised each other from third year when we decided what to do with our lives. That way if we don't get in, then we don't have to tell anyone. And if we do get accepted…well then, there's a pleasant surprise for everyone!"

The door swung open, revealing a tall, slender woman who looked somewhere in her twenties. She had long flowing curls to the middle of her back, and a slightly pointy nose. "Can I help you?"

"We're looking for jobs." James blurted and Sirius responded to his comment with a jab in the ribs.

"We want to become aurors." Sirius said firmly.

"I assumed that." She snapped, "Most people who come here want to become one. What I mean is…why are you here?"

"Er…" Sirius glanced uneasily at her tightly fitting suit that seemed to give her a surprisingly more menacing appearance. "We're here because we want to become aurors."

She narrowed her eyes, "If you can't answer the question, I will not let you in."

With that she slammed the door. James turned to look at Sirius, "What the bloody hell just happened?"

Sirius trailed his fingers over the red brick. There were little plants protruding in the cracks, and as he ran his fingers over one, he furrowed his brow.

"Why are we here James?"

"Because we want to become auro-"

"No, James." Sirius sighed, "I mean…why are we here? Why do we want to become aurors? In third year we wanted to because it sounded cool. Beating up bad guys and destroying Voldemort…"

A collective shiver seemed to ring throughout the still town. It seemed deserted, yet everything, even the tiny green shrubs in the building seemed alert.

James sighed and kicked a small stone that lay by his shoe. "I want to have that feeling of protection. Not just for me, but for Lily, and our friends. I want to be able to save people who seem helpless. I want the feeling of doing something right for once. I have skill Sirius. We both do. I think it's time we put our mind and strength into something besides pranks and girls. We have the power to make a difference. And I think this is the best way to do it."

Sirius nodded, "I think of myself so much. When Sara left, I felt pity for me. Not for her. Not the one who lost someone dear to her. I feel bad for myself so much. But lately…I think of what I do have. I think of what I could do. You're right James. We're strong wizards…we have the ability to change things. We have the ability to prevent evil."

The door slowly eased open, causing James and Sirius to leap back in alarm.

"Even if that was a bit sappy, and even if you two seem too soft to become aurors…" The same lady in the suit said, the hint of a smile itching at the corners of her lips. "That was an appropriate question. Come on you two saps, get inside and we'll see what we can do to toughen you up a bit."

James and Sirius looked to each other with the same, goofy grin across their face, and together strode into the building. They had yet to discover that this would be the one place that would change their view on life, forever.

* * *

A/N: So it was short and uneventful and took foreverrr to put out. but this is still a base for those who are just joining in because i need to fit in all the background information. review on what you would like to see happen! ill update soon. pinky promise :) Thanks and Love you all! 


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